Wow...I see a habit forming here when it comes to my recent meltdown activity...
Yesterday we had our kick off meeting- met with the embryologist, IVF Nurses, learned how to give shots, mapped out the days of this next cycle and was feeling really positive about the situation. Than we had our last appointment of the day which was with the financial department. Our expectations of that last meeting were very different than what happened. They had been telling us over and over that they have a medical loan program that is so easy, everyone uses it, great interest rates, and accepting of all applicants. Well, when we got to the meeting their story had changed and they informed us that with the economy, the denial rates were through the roof. This was the straw that broke the camels back, and I burst into tears in the meeting. I shocked even myself! Brian, on the other hand, said he had been waiting for that outburst and was surprised it took me so long.
When we did get home, we were promptly denied when we applied on line. I think they had denied us even before I hit "enter". This denial set off a meltdown of epic proportions....just ask my mom and sister.
If we can''t find the money, we can't have a baby...it's pretty simple math.
After 3 hours of sobbing, my mom came up with a possible solution which involves asking Granny for a loan. I have no clue if she will be up for it. I am literally sick to my stomach. If she says no, we may have to cancel everything.
This is like a never ending nightmare. Not one single part of this has been easy. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.
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